​I shared this with my challenge group today but it's been a reoccurring topic among my conversations lately I wanted to share with you!

I didn't start this health journey to repair my relationship with myself. I really didn't. I was annoyed by a few pounds of baby weight that I couldn't ditch to save my life. I hated the way my clothes fit and I attributed all my self loathing to those few pounds. If I could JUST lose the weight, I'd be happy. I didn't start out with the right mindset but truly caring for myself changed everything!

Well, I was able to shed the pounds with the 21 Day Fix but the weight I really lost was the weight of living for other people's approval. I had spent my entire life trying to be PERFECT all the time. It was exhausting and impossible. Practicing self care literally taught me how to love and appreciate myself just how I was. God used it to free me from a prison I didn't even know I was in and that is why I am so passionate about what we do here!

Your weight is not the problem, your food addiction is not your problem. The problem is that you don't fully see and feel your worth. You were handcrafted by God and even within that, WHO you are is infinitely more important that what you look like!

Yes,  I want you to have a healthy body! It is amazing to feel good in your own skin! But it's also freedom to pursue all the incredible things that you were created to do which makes life EXCITING! Food is a blessing. God could have made eating an obligation and instead He made it a joy! When it becomes and idol and a distraction and even a hinderance to your life, it's time to look deeper. It's time to repair the relationship you have with yourself.

Just as with any relationship, it takes time to turn things around. Learning what you truly need, not a false fix, is a process. You are going to make mistakes and learn and grow, but each moment you choose to continue, you heal. You have decided that you are worth fighting for and slowing little by little you see JUST how worthy you really are! I want this for you because it will change your life! It will change how you feel about yourself, it will change how you date or how you respond to your spouse. It will change how you raise your children and what they expect of their role in life. It will change how you let people treat you, and help you respond to others from a position of strength.

Yes, I want you to reach every goal you have set for yourself but more than that, I want you to LOVE who you become in the process and I want to see you bloom through it! If we only knew our full potential, we would never settle for a sulky afternoon on the couch with junk food! We would be too busy living exciting fulfilling lives! I know this might sound a little dramatic for a fitness post but this is what the program has done for me! 

If you achieve your fitness goal you will have gotten your money's worth but I hope you experience so much more than that! 

We are gearing up for another round in April, if you are ready to start working on this relationship, we would love to have you join us! ❤️

​One of my self limiting beliefs was that other women don't like me. And you know what? Some don't and that's ok. 

I'm a little intense. I like to talk about deep things. I dislike chit chat and mingling. I'm much more at home in a private gathering than a party. I'd rather be reading a book or working out than getting my hair and nails done. I choose jeans and bare feet over dresses and high heels. I choose travel and experiences over things.

You know why I felt so insecure all those years? I spent my time being silent, feeling like I was different( and unacceptable) from everyone else. It was a little nerve racking when I decided I was just going to be me. I was prepared to lose friends and I did lose a few, but the most amazing thing happened! 

Suddenly, I started finding my people! They were all around me. I just had to live loudly and be me and suddenly they could see me. 
I am surrounded by women now that, not only love me, but are like me! We read the same books, work out, grow together, avoid loud parties, rock jeans and bare feet and love every minute of it!

If you've been believing the lie that you don't belong, it's time to find your people! Shine brightly, be who you are, enjoy your life and your tribe will find you! You are beautiful and worthy and unique, revel in it!

  #beyoutiful #findyourtribe

​We were catching up on 'This Is Us' last night ( no spoilers, I promise! Phillip would kill me!) but one of the things that struck me about this particular episode was how all the characters were really depicted at my current age. The struggles of being late thirties. No matter what decisions we have made, it feels like so many doors have closed. The decisions we have made have formed a certain kind of life and we can start feeling trapped by our circumstances. 

Marriage is hard, much harder than it seemed when we were free and twitterpated. We have made job choices around providing instead of pursuing our passions ( at times because we had to), our children have grown to a point that we aren't as needed anymore. We can start feeling irrelevant.

I had certainly started feeling that way. Before marriage and kids, I was FULL of life and ambition. I took risks, I was in love with my life, and meeting and marrying Phillip was part of that. We found each other in the middle of all that excitement and potential and I have no doubt that he is the one for me. We are of one mind, but even still, we had to start making decisions for our family. We decided together that I would stay home to be with our children, a decision I have no regrets about and yet it was gut wrenching leaving a job that I loved and a life I was proud of to start something new and unknown. I felt insecure about my abilities as a wife and a mother without the fulfillment of my career, I had too much of my self worth in my performance and that was revealed when I took away something that made me feel accomplished.

Our budget was tight and things had to be trimmed out, things we enjoyed, things that had brought us together in the first place. We had less time, less resources, and we started losing touch with all that excitement and potential. This is the beginning of a midlife crisis! This is the lie that our best days are behind us! That is not the problem. The problem is that we stopped dreaming.

I thank God for my husbands wisdom because he saw the answer first. He saw my need to have something of my own and my interest in serving others. He saw me telling people about the workout program that I was doing and saw how excited I was to help people get started and he told me I needed to coach. He made me do something for myself and that saved us.  It was just one small decision. It didn't seem like a big deal but once I started feeling excited about my life again, lots of things started happening. We started dreaming. We started taking risks again. We got back to the root of who we are as individuals and as a couple.

A few months later, he decided he wanted to move to Colorado...in three weeks! He flew out for a week, found a place, and we MOVED. That is something we would have done long ago and we had the freedom to do it because we had both taken jobs that allowed us to work from home. There was nothing holding us back and it felt GOOD!

It doesn't matter if you are 20 or 100. If you are breathing, keep dreaming! Your age or circumstances aren't holding you back, they are simply different seasons of life, different hurdles to jump. In some ways you are MORE qualified to be successful in your later years because you have a mature frame of mind that you didn't have in your 20's, use it! Don't stand in front of the mirror mourning the loss of your youth, you are wasting time. In 20 years, you will be mourning the loss of THIS age! Instead, make the most of your life! Dream and then do the things that make you so excited you can't sleep!

Instead of letting your past haunt you, let your future potential haunt you! You are destined for greatness, that is why it's discouraging when you know you aren't reaching your full potential. It's not youth that makes us feel alive, it's pursuing the best version of ourselves, so get to it!

March 26th I am having a no obligation sneak peak into coaching. I'll be sharing my story and answering questions live and I would LOVE to spend some time with you and help you find out if this is a path for you! If you would love to build a life serving and encouraging people and having freedom to work from home ( or on the go) come join us! No pressure, just a fun chat to get you the answers you need as you dream! Message me or comment below and I will add you to the list! <3

One of the most common reasons I see people stalling or not reaching their goals is that they don’t really have them! They might feel like they do but “ Lose weight” isn’t a goal. 


A goal is, “ I am going to lose 10 pounds by March 31st.” Declaring a specific number and giving a deadline causes the brain and emotions to react differently. Actions matter more when goals are specific. We KNOW we won’t hit that goal if we cheat on our nutrition or skip workouts in that 5 week period. It’s a short period of time to reach an attainable goal! It helps us focus our energy, knowing there is a deadline ( and a stopping point). 


Ambiguous goals actually hinder our progress. It's easy to make excuses when it seems like the work never ends. We have more success when we are laser focused and planning our cheats and treats rather than caving in weak moments because we've " been working so hard we deserve a break". We deserve to feel excited about our lives!! And when we crush our goals we feel amazing! That celebration might come with a margarita or a slice of cake but treating ourselves before we reach the goal only brings discouragement. 


If you have been struggling, losing and gaining the same few pounds, not being consistent with your nutrition or your workouts, I want you to take some time today and write out your health goal for this month and for the entire year! Where do you want to be in a month? In a year? How will you feel when you hit that goal? Dream about it! You deserve to feel that good about yourself! Not just as a person that has lost weight or gained muscle but as someone who makes goals and crushes them! It feels AWESOME!!


Here is a helpful tip from Chalene Johnson:


"Your goals should mesh with your priorities.  Take some time to decide on your priorities in life.  What’s most important to you?  What do you refuse to compromise?  Now, ask yourself if your goals align with your priorities…ALL of them.  Each and every goal you set should align with your top priority.  If for some reason one of your goals compromises your priorities, think outside the box and find a creative way to achieve your goal while honoring what’s important to you."


One of my priorities is my family. This means my progress is slower at times because my goals have to reflect what's best for my whole family! I would do double workouts everyday and never have any food in the house that slowed down my progress, but that doesn't serve my husband or my kids. My goals have to be attainable with that in mind! I ask myself, what can I do to push myself within those perimeters and then I go for it!  

One of the ways I hold myself accountable to this is through my challenge group! I set public goals, I log my workouts, I share what I am eating, I share when I fail. The process of recording it all and being vulnerable with others spurs me on to greater success.

Right now, in this moment, I want you to cast aside ANY discouragement or shame you feel. The problem isn't that you don't have what it takes to lose weight, eat healthier, or work out. The problem is you haven't had a true measureable GOAL and the tools to complete it. Ive met women that had the goal but truly had no idea of how to eat to make it a reality. They stocked their house with foods they thought were healthy, they made changes, worked out and saw very little in the way of results. They needed to understand nutrition before they could make effective goals. You need the goal and the proper tools! That is why I LOVE what I do! I get to provide women with an arsenal of tools, help them set goals, and then encourage them as they work their butts off! Those moments when they lose the first few pounds, do their first push-up, up their weights for the first time, and see that they have what it takes to make their wishes come to life is THE BEST!!! I see it everyday, so believe me when I say YOU can do this!!

We have a group starting March 5th and I would LOVE to see your beautiful among these awesome ladies! Message me to learn more about the process or you can reach out here! Don't wish for things your whole life, set a goal and make them happen! 

http://www.angelsofvalor.com/join-a-challenge-group.html

“Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing.” ~ Helen Keller


I spend 4 years hiding in what felt secure. Keeping myself closed off, avoiding the danger of being hurt, of being seen, of being judged and feeling shame. I didn't see my worth. Hiding in my comfort zone wasn't that comfortable and I certainly wasn't happy. My negative outlook affected how I cared for myself ( or lack thereof), and I had no exciting adventures.


Then one day I decided I was tired of that existence and I decided I was making a change. It was a private change from with inside my home but the very act of caring for myself lit a spark in me that turned into the power to change on a much larger scale!
You are worthy. Right now in this moment. You don't need to change anything but your perspective but changing your actions helps to change your perspective. Treating yourself well makes you more aware of your worth and you gain courage. Courage to stand up and say, without shame "This is who I am!", as you go about becoming the best version of your worthy self. That better version is all internal, my dear, but the outside catches up as you treat yourself with the respect you deserve!
​

These simple actions, exercising and eating well, changed my life, not because I have a better body but because it showed me what it felt like to be respected. I had to respect myself first!

Any other pumpkin pie lovers out there? These 21 Day Fix approved pumpkin pie energy bites are to die for!

Ingredients

• 1 cup pitted dates
• Warm water
• ½ cup raw pecan halves (or pecan pieces)
• ⅓ cup canned pumpkin puree
• ¼ cup unsweetened coconut flakes, reserve small amount for garnish
• 1 tsp. pure hazelnut extract (or pure maple extract)
• 1 tsp. pure maple syrup
• 2 tsp. pumpkin pie spice
• 1 pinch sea salt (or Himalayan salt)

Instructions

1. Place dates in a medium bowl; cover with water. Let soak for 10 minutes. Drain. Set aside.
2. Place pecans in food processor; pulse until finely ground.
3. Add dates, pumpkin, coconut, extract, maple syrup, pumpkin pie spice, and salt; pulse until well mixed. Place in a medium bowl. Refrigerate, covered, for 30 minutes.
4. Using clean hands, roll into tablespoon-sized balls; roll in reserved coconut (if desired).
5. Store, refrigerated, in airtight container.

​I bought myself a pair of sunglasses today. I know that doesn't seem like it deserves an announcement but I bought them shame free! I used to feel intense shame any time I did things or purchased things for myself.

In fact, it was so bad for awhile, my husband would have to force my hand by ordering things for me or pushing me out of the house for a break.  It was this deep seeded idea that I wasn't worthy. I wasn't aware of it, I only experienced the negative emotions tied to it.

The last time my husband had to force my hand into caring for myself was when I bought a challenge pack. I was mentioning it often, and he could tell I wanted to try. He told me he thought it would be good for me and he thought I should try coaching. I made every excuse in the book, because I was afraid to try and fail. It took him 8 months to convince me!

Beachbody doesn't just hand you a program and nutrition plan, (though that would be plenty!), they recommend personal development every day. They recognize that losing weight isn't our greatest need, it's a symptom of a greater problem, that we need healthy minds and emotions to be TRULY healthy!

I realized through the process that I carried shame for bringing debt into our marriage even though I busted my butt to pay it off before we had kids. I carried shame for quitting my job to stay home and care for our children, even though it's what we both wanted. My whole life I have been driven by performance and other's approval. I've been hustling for my worth as long as I can remember and it only got worse when I felt like I wasn't contributing financially. ( My poor sweet husband!)

This program revealed brokenness in me and gave me the tools to begin healing. So, today when I splurged on myself and felt no shame, that was huge! It's ok to invest in myself, it's ok to for me to spend money on things that bring me joy! Seeing my worth, gaining confidence, being comfortable with my body, has changed my life. I can honestly say I am a different person, the best version of myself that I have ever been and I'm not slowing down! Ive gained a vision for serving the world and making a differences and I now know that I have the power to do it!

If you have been on the fence about jumping into a challenge group with us, I cannot encourage you enough to take the leap! It truly is a risk-free investment in your healing and happiness! Our next challenge group starts March 5th and I would LOVE to see you there!  I would love to talk to you about where you are at emotionally and the goals you would like to achieve this year! I have a challenger that has lost almost 50 pounds since August, but more importantly she has gained courage and confidence. She sees her worth and is standing up for herself! It's beautiful and it's why I am so passionate about what I do! Send me a message so me we can make a plan for YOUR transformation, inside and out! <3