Confessions of a Calorie Counter

I was obsessed with calorie counting. I allowed myself a max of 1200 calories a day and was overjoyed if I managed to stay below that number. My perspective was that thin was the goal and it didn't matter what I ate as long as I could be thin. I was also obsessed with food, thinking constantly about the next time I could eat and my diet consisted heavily of carbs with fruits and veggies thrown in. I don't care for proteins so they were just void from my diet except for eggs now and again. Sometimes, I would lose control and binge and then feel so disgusted with myself that I wouldn't eat for days to make up for it. I know there is probably no diagnosis for that sort of life but if that's not an eating disorder, I don't what is.

We have learned a lot of bad information from our culture, such as: You can eat anything you want as long as you stick to a certain number of calories. This is simply not true. Yes, the amount of calories is important. We need to know the general numbers like we do in our challenge groups to see how many containers of food we should be eating, but eating hollow calories full of sugar and chemicals doesn't actually feed your body. You are eating and yet your body is starving! It doesn't have what it needs to properly do its job and we will eventually lose our health over it. Some faster than others.

I fell for this for a long time and I calorie counted every day for YEARS. I did keep my weight down but I could never get rid of the pudge around my waist and I never felt good. I definitely didn't resemble a Victoria Secret model which was my ideal (another lie I bought into ). I wasn't healthy. I was addicted to red bull, eating small amounts of carbs at every meal to satisfy my intense cravings. I thought about food ALL the time. This is not a healthy way to live and neither is giving into every craving that we have. When the 21 Day Fix came into my life and I actually started really working on my nutrition instead of simply calorie counting, everything changed. My perspective changed from thin to strong and healthy, my food intake went from diet to nutrition, and my idea of beauty also began to change. There is so much freedom in just being the best version of YOU and forgetting everything else. When you stop comparing yourself to others, joy returns and contentment is found.

 We need to purge what we have been taught and reprogram ourselves to understand the truth. The first truth is that you are worthy right now, in whatever condition your body is in, and it may be hard to believe that. You may have had well meaning people in your life pushing you, prodding you , concerned for you in a way that makes it seem like you aren't good enough until you lose the weight, or you might have actually have people being unkind, or maybe its just your inner dialogue where you play derogatory comments to yourself every time you look in the mirror or every time you see someone that fits your mental ideal. If looking good is your only reason for getting fit, it's going to be hard to keep going.

 I'm going to be 36 in a couple weeks and I can already see my beauty fading. Even if I keep this up perfectly, I am still getting old. My perspective has switched though and my "why" has expanded to something much greater than beauty.

She is clothed with strength and dignity;
she can laugh at the days to come. Proverbs 31:25

Being fit for me means being clothed with strength and dignity, not beauty. I was given what beauty I got and it's fading but the character that I am building will shine even when I am so old that no one can see a glimmer of my physical beauty. I no longer find my hope in becoming more beautiful and that is huge for me.

The second truth is that food is first and foremost for our health. If we ate what was created for us, it would serve not only as our sustenance but also as our medicine. When we eat healthy, we get healthy. Just because someone looks like a super model and can seemingly eat whatever she wants, she can't. It WILL catch up with her. Good DNA can only go so far when your body isn't being filled with what it needs to survive and thrive. I have seen so many people come off of medicines that doctors said they would be on the rest of their lives because they chose to eat nutritious food. It's a powerful life change.

If your "why" isn't strong enough, think about it some today. I want you to think about how amazing your body really is and all that it allows you to accomplish everyday. Eat well today because it creates a future full of freedom. Let's be 80 year old ladies that go on cruises and not older women that spend their last years in a nursing home.

 My grandmother is 95 years old and fully functioning! It's an inspiration to me! A lifetime of good decisions has lead her to be financially free, physically healthy, and getting to see all the generations that came from the family she started. 

Don't be discouraged today! Make a slight mental adjustment and keep going! If you don't know where to start or you are feeling overwhelmed about your health or nutrition in general, please message me. I am happy to send you information completely free! And if you are ready to really be held accountable and get into a group that will surround you and lift you up as you pursue your health I have one starting September 7th. Message me at [email protected] for details!