You are more important. It's something I say to my daughters when they break something important to me or spill something on the carpet. It's my way of letting them know that NO thing will ever matter more than they do. It's also a good reminder for myself in those moments when I want to cry over the loss of something that was precious to me, because nothing will ever be more important than my daughters. It's all about perspective.
The other day, my daughter Scarlett disobeyed and because she did, she broke a glass. With eyes full of tears, she asked for forgiveness which I gave her but I didn't say the usual phrase. wiping her eyes she asked, " Am I more important, mama?"
Ladies, we have to train ourselves this way too. I heard a quote by Courtney Martin recently that said, "We are a generation of young women who were told we could do anything and instead heard that we had to be everything.” If you have not heard this before, let me be the first to say, you do not have to be everything! You cannot be everything! We are a generation obsessed with perfection and that is unattainable. it makes us feel that we are unworthy, ugly, and less than others. It makes us catty, mean, unkind,and defensive. It disconnects us from others. It makes other women the enemy.
We are believing the lie that we are not important unless we are successful in the eyes of everyone. We need to be perfect wives, mothers and business women( with perfect bodies and bank accounts )that can throw elaborate pinterest parties with gourmet food! I don't know about you but even writing that stressed me out!
Something that Brene Brown expressed in her book Daring Greatly is that our mission in life is to pursue the things that bring us joy and be examples of fulfilled human beings. The way we change things is by being the example. The way we teach our kids is by being the example. We have to be willing to live wholehearted lives, willing to own up to our weaknesses and celebrate our strengths so that shame has no place in our lives.
As a fitness coach, I see shame hinder people everyday. One mistake and they are embarrassed and ready to throw in the towel. It's hard to live out loud. It's hard to let people see your weaknesses, but the truth it's a universal problem. We all fail everyday. The way we show ourselves that we are more important is by admitting our mistakes, accepting our flaws, and celebrating our strengths. When shame comes knocking, slam the door in its face. You are more important than a missed work out or a greasy meal. You are more important than a missed doctors appointment or the bag of groceries you left at the store. You are more important than the car you dented ( or even totaled)! It's time you started treating yourself like something that cannot be replaced. Yes, I believe exercising and eating well is important. I think practicing those disciplines trains you to see your worth, but you must also think true thoughts and speak truth to yourself. It takes practice. You have to catch yourself in negative patterns and choose to break them but over time you CAN change your perspective! When those moments arise ask yourself," Am I more important than_________?
If this is a struggle for you and you need some accountability, we would love to have you join our next challenge group! Yes, we are exercising and focus on nutrition but we are also learning to have grace for ourselves and see our worth. If shame is weighing you down, come live out loud with us!
"And Aubrey was her name. A not so very ordinary girl or name."(Or so says David Gates ;) I'm a wife to Phillip, a mother to Scarlett and Juliet. We live in the beautiful city of Thornton, Co. I'm a recovering red bull addict. I love to read. I hate to cook. I seek to be inspired and also to inspire others. I am a Beachbody Coach on a quest to be truly healthy mind, soul, and body and challenge others to do the same.