When I was 7, my family was evicted from our home. We packed all our belongings and headed to Florida on "vacation" but I was old enough to understand what was happening.
A few nights before we left, I was invited to spend the night with my best friend but I was so riddled with fear that halfway through the night her sweet father had to walk me home. I don't know exactly what I was afraid of, getting left behind perhaps, but the fear was real and intense and it stayed that way for years. I didn't spend the night anywhere again until I was 10 years old.
During those years, I became afraid of a lot. I was terrified my parents were going to die. I was suspicious of strangers and often made plans in my head about how I would escape perilous situations with my siblings. Fear was running rampant in my thoughts and because it was what I focused on, it expanded.
When I was ten, my adult cousin Shannan, who I still adore, invited me to fly out to California for a visit. I was over the moon! When we were boarding the plane, they had us return to the gate and announced they were having technical problems. Half an hour later when they were boarding again, I did not get on the plane. The habits I had built with fearful thoughts had left me immobilized in that moment.
I watched that plane leave without me and I was so sad on the way home that I vowed I wouldn't let fear do that to me anymore. No more missed adventures because I was afraid, I have never missed another one.
Fear really isn't the trouble. Fear serves us in moments of TRUE danger. It alerts us to react in ways that can save our lives or the lives of others. The problem surfaces when we respond to non-emergency situations like they are dire!
Have you ever had to give a speech and you were trembling so much you could barely hold your note cards? That fear isn't serving you! The only way to put fear in its place there is to GIVE THE SPEECH. Pushing yourself outside the realm of fears control, doing it anyway and seeing that no one died. Every time you practice the thing that makes you nervous your fearful response lessens until you aren't afraid at all.
Fear has become a challenge for me. If I am afraid to do something, I go for it. I have fallen in love with proving to myself that I am stronger than my fears.
So often, the reasons people give me for NOT changing things in their life that they are unhappy with are fear related. They are afraid to start a challenge group because they are afraid they will fail. They are afraid to fall their passion and become a coach because they are afraid of what people will think. They are afraid to come face to face with themselves and see the truth about themselves.
The truth is that YOU have so much untapped potential! They truth is that you are at AMAZING at things you haven't even discovered yet! The truth is that life is about self discovery and if you start something and you don't love it or don't want to continue, that doesn't make you a failure! You have just scratched something off the list. The truth is that living a life filled with fear and shame is a waste. Fear will always be there. It's not going away but can put it in its place and only allow it to serve us and not to control us. We get to choose whether or not we are going to engage with it.
I can promise from experience that it is better to try and fall flat on your face than to live in the discomfort and unhappiness of a life you aren't truly living.
Make a promise to yourself not to miss out on any more adventures because you are afraid. We live in this beautiful world in a free country with everything at our finger tips, let's be dreamers and doers! Make a list and let it grow!
"And Aubrey was her name. A not so very ordinary girl or name."(Or so says David Gates ;) I'm a wife to Phillip, a mother to Scarlett and Juliet. We live in the beautiful city of Thornton, Co. I'm a recovering red bull addict. I love to read. I hate to cook. I seek to be inspired and also to inspire others. I am a Beachbody Coach on a quest to be truly healthy mind, soul, and body and challenge others to do the same.